Independence Day 2010

Happy post 4th of July Seattle!! It's amazing how far we have come in just a year! Last year the host of Lake Union's Family Fourth, One Reel, announced that they would no longer be holding the annual Family Fourth at Gas Works park due to lack of funding. Seattle really pulled together not only a community, but a family and raised the funds necessary to be able to continue this magnificent gathering.

This year was amazing! My girlfriend and I scrambled all over Seattle trying to find the right spot to settle down and watch the fireworks. This is our first year in Seattle for the 4th of July, we had absolutely no clue where to plant our selves. We finally got to a corner on a sidewalk where we could view the Fireworks going off at Lake Union just perfectly. We were surrounded by other Seattlites huddled together in the wind waiting to view the long awaited show. It lasted about 20 minutes and had many amazing, colorful, loud fireworks shaped as smiley faces, boxes, and more.

This year the Family Fourth got the 'Presidents of the United States of America' to perform live at the event. They were amazing! They played a smash of all their greatest hits. They actually had a small mosh pit going on up front. I did not envy the individuals in the front getting smooshed up against the fence that bordered around the stage.

Over all this year was spectacular. It seemed more special this year than any year, because this year Independence Day was not just hosted by one company, but all of Seattle, business owners and individuals alike. So I say Thank you Seattle. Thank you for an amazing year! I sure hope to see you next year!

What was your Independence Day 2010 like this year? Please leave a comment and let me know!

Over the Rainbow

Pride 2010 is tomorrow, and I am sooo stoked. This will only be my second Pride, and my girlfriends 1st! The parade literally walks right past our apartment windows (We are on the 1st floor). I plan on waking up early to get a good curbside seat, where I am sure to get tons of swag!

I have $20 bucks to my name and I plan on spending it at Pride!

I scored a FREE 18"x 13" Pride flag from Love Zone. I found a coupon for it in the Stranger. No purchase necessary! I call that a score! lol

I am excited.. For the first time ever, the Seattle Space Needle is now flying (proudly) the gay pride flag! You can read more about the story HERE.

This is just a short blog, I will be updating tomorrow thought with TONS of pictures!

Testing!

Test test test test test test test test test test test....................

Psychoanalysis & Pop Psychology

I got to thinking about fathers, or the lack there of. Some say a daughters relationship with her father is a model for all of her sub-sequential relationships with men. Is that just pop psychology, or is there some truth to it? And if you were given a less than perfect model does it mean a life of less than perfect relationships? I couldn't help but wonder... how much does a father figure, figure?

Does this theory apply to homosexual relationships? Sigmund Freud's basic theory of human sexuality was that all human beings were innately bisexual, and that they become heterosexual or homosexual as a result of their experiences with parents and others (Freud, 1905). In a now-famous letter to an American mother in 1935, Freud wrote:

"Homosexuality is assuredly no advantage, but it is nothing to be ashamed of, no vice, no degradation, it cannot be classified as an illness; we consider it to be a variation of the sexual function produced by a certain arrest of sexual development. Many highly respectable individuals of ancient and modern times have been homosexuals, several of the greatest men among them (Plato, Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, etc.). It is a great injustice to persecute homosexuality as a crime, and cruelty too....(reprinted in Jones, 1957, pp. 208-209, from the American Journal of Psychiatry, 1951, 107, 786).

Does this mean, if I did not form a (good) relationship with either of my parents (at birth or early child hood) I am definitely going to be screwed when it comes to forming relationships with a perspective partner?

Just something to think about...

Relationships are about compromise. But where do you draw the line between compromising, and compromising yourself? Is it possible to be so much in love that you don't exist anymore, but only your 'compromised self'?

On that note, love... love is a tricky think. It is dangerous, and sneaky. Which brings us to another subject... Fate. Do the stars and the moon control fate? Is there really that one person out there for each of us, and if so, with one wrong turn or mistake can we loose or miss out on that person and be alone forever?

who arrrrre yoooou?

I think what hurts the most, is I have no idea who I am anymore. When did I become this angry, and bitter individual with no heart? I have a heart. My life revolves around helping those in need. When did I become so greedy? A three year relationship where I gave my all and got nothing in return that ended in soul shattering oblivious heartache? Now I expect everything I want? It's what I believe I deserve. But is this me now? I just want something I've been looking forward to, to go as expected. So why am I so hurt that it hasn't, when nothing has? When did I become so greedy? I don't like this feeling. I used to be so care free and humble. When did this change?

The Hours

I am now officially residing in BellTown Seattle. It has been a long time coming. The view of the Space Needle at night is breath taking. I am so happy about living in the city. I do however have to get used to people walking right in front of our windows. I like to keep the windows open during the day, little man and I love people watching. I find myself wanting to scare every unsuspecting Seattlite that walks by, by yelling, 'RAWR' lol.
There is a surprising amount of foot traffic outside our windows. I would have said it was because we are only a block from the Seattle Center, but we get just as much foot traffic at 3 a.m. as we do during daylight. Laying in bed listening to the late night car and transit traffic is soothing. It reminds me of my grandmother's old house just off the freeway in Monroe. I would stay up late listening to the unseen traffic zoom by. The only two differences now are that I am now sharing a bed with my fiancée instead of my grandmother, and I now can also occasionally hear the drunks on their way home. Listening to them scream, mumble, and stumble makes me wonder what their story is, and what led them to drink.
Internet will be connected on the third, so for now I am writing you from my lovely Android MyTouch.
For now, this is Orchid in Seattle, signing out.

Walking Blind

I have never thought about where things are going in my life, as much as I do now. Looking back on how I used to live my life is like looking at old archived news papers in the library news paper reading room, that just shoot the grey papers by so fast. I was so caught up in life. I was never in any sort of stable environment. Moving constantly, relationships constantly changing. I used to be so bold. lol I say this because I would always meet up with anyone I met online, as unsafe as that may have been. I was all about making friends, experiencing new things and having a good time.

I like to think I am the same person now, though life has slowed down so much. I am in my second serious committed relationship. The first one tore my heart to shreds. I really gave into that pain and heartache. I lost everything I was. Several years have passed and I still feel like I am trying to get on stable ground. Trying to find myself again. I have a lot to work on.

I've been so hurt by people who are closest to me, friends and family. I forgive. Always. I get hurt again. I forgive again. It is a cycle. When I watch shows like 'Sex in the City', 'Desperate Housewife's' as naive as it may be (i know they are tv shows) it really makes me sad. I want more than anything to have a group of friend I can turn to no matter what. A group of individuals I can really count on to be there. People I can have a good time with, and get together with on a weekly basis. To play board games, cards, watch Lword series, or whatever. I sort of feel like I am stopping myself. I don't know why, or how. I don't even know how to go about making friends. That is pretty devastating.

We move next week. I am exciting because this feels like the last move, for a long time. I will be in a central area close to family, and lots of activities (so I stop being a home body). I will be broadcasting from SEATTLE baby! I can take a short bus ride to Westlake Center or even Pike Place Market!

I have no idea what comes next. I am walking blind into love, into life and into what comes next. My eyes are blind folded, and my heart is ready for anything to take place.